LB?

i was reading this:

Brown wants to get fired. That is why he talked to the Associated Press last week and publicly declared that he loves the Pistons and sincerely wants to keep his job. It's a humongous lie, of course, because Brown wants out as badly as the Pistons want him out. But if he claims that he is healthy enough to coach and that he is perfectly willing to resume with the Pistons, Detroit has no choice but to fire him. That's why both Brown and his agent have been all over the media, bemoaning the fact that Pistons don't want him.

it struck me afterwards.... nampaknyer gua ngan LB berada dalam position yg samer.. here I am badly wanted to leave this organization in order to do sumthing that i luv n huv been waitin ever so patiently to do... but at the same time, becoz of a few uncertainties, still gua tak berani lagik nak walk away.. sebab uncertainties will alwayz huv a probability of 0.5.. camner kite rase lebih pun.. sebenanye it is alwayz 50 - 50.... on top of it all.. im scared.. i dont wanna be here.. it is true.. but i dont wanna be jobless kalo benda benda tak work out....

i am aware that kite tak bole dpt semua menda yg kite nak kat dunia nih.. that all time we are presented with choice.. whether we are aware or at unconcious level.. musti ader choice.. made up choice pun ader jugak wen it is obvious aper yg kite nak buat.. all n all we r dealin wit risk n consequences... remember.. every action has a reaction... aper yg kite buat ade consequences nyer.. n that is why it is so hard to make a decision wen u got less information to help u.. apertah lagik biler u huv less ppl to help u to get that information....

its inevitable they would say... n it is pretty obvious.. actions gua sepanjang beberapa bulan lepas nih hanyer melabelkan satu menda ajer.. i want out.. i can see that.. i believe they can see it too.. just like LB.. if not why would i enganged n flirt wit that reality in the 1st place....? yer betul.. takde org gatal gatal nak try buat sumthing.. remember causality.. semua menda ader reasons... n yes almost all things kena ader justification.... so that is the obvious.. probably they are wondering aper lagik yg gua tunggu?... i am sure they are just waiting.... well little did they knew.. i am waiting for the right moment... wat is my definition of the right moment...? the right moment ader lah moment di maner i am sure that i will get IT without any reasonable doubts... wen it that?... i dunno... it could be sumtime between last week.. or even next month... kakakkaakkka....

the problem?.. neither them nor me knows when... but decision time is now... i wish i coulda talk my way out of this.. n agreed to a buyout just like LB did... damn LB.. gua tatau apsal gua feel so close to this guy.. not that i like him.. man i dont.. but he's a job hopper.. goin from city to city.. bawak dieorg to the promise land pastuh carik tempat baru.... (for those non-baller or kaki-bangku-nba... LB nih coach last year pistons yg menang c'ship.. n yes die jugak coach tahun nih sampai game 7.. before nih die coach AI.. hawks n some others.. look it up man.. gua pun tak igt).. sumhow mengigtkan gua kepada gua.. cumer i do it for the money.... (ermm.. gua rase die pun)

so i dont know...? should i?.. (leave vote in my comments kalo korang sudi nak jadik a part of this decision making).. i will do my best to delay things.. i know the tension will only mounts.. lagik lagik biler besok ader progress meeting tajuk : the future of our team... wat do i answer wen bein asked the question - wat huv u been doin these past months?.. an honest answer would be : lepak-goyang kaki-makan gaji buta-tunggu time.. kakakakkakkka.... but that is the truth... i would huv like to end this drama .. lebih kurang mcm season finale.. penuh suspens n shit.. i want to end this n move on.. bukak chapter baru n shit jugak... u know..

wat happen then:

Larry Brown's departure from the Detroit Pistons' organization should not be considered a surprise, given the nomadic coach's history of brief but successful coaching stints. In two seasons, Brown brilliantly led the Pistons to back-to-back Finals appearances, the first of which resulted in the franchise's third NBA championship.

But when Brown allowed himself to be romanced by the Cleveland Cavaliers – who wanted to hire him as team president – during the Pistons' playoff run, he probably sealed his own fate. The team's management understandably was upset, and owner Bill Davidson was furious for what he perceived as a lack of loyalty from Brown as Detroit was attempting to win another title.

now... if that is a sign... i know wat i huv to do.. then... n yes mr. anderson it is inevitable... now.. when will i find the guts to do it?...